August 2011
1 post
Scientific writing
Evidently, doctoral students must practice writing at least 5 hours in order to obtain acceptable proficiency in the subject. It is sad, then, to consider the neglect with which clear and incisive writing is given by scientists. When reading a paper, we demand precision and clarity from those whose ideas we consider; and yet the art of good writing is dismissed as foppish and irrelevant. I...
July 2010
1 post
drowning in physics
I seem to be up against a task that I don’t really understand. If I did, I would get to it, but I suppose this is what real, grown-up physics is like: not just getting the right answer, but posing the terms of the question properly. I haven’t managed yet to get even that far. I pray that I will succeed, but I think I might have waded in a little too deep on this one.
April 2010
2 posts
the big, scary future
I can’t help but think that I’ve made a giant mistake which I will regret for the rest of my days. I don’t want to go into specifics, but a lack of discipline will never fail to undo you.
refusal
It is taking everything I have not to fizzle and die right now. I am a 21 year old man, and yet my parents represent as much of an intrusive annoyance across the state of Michigan as they did when I was still living at home. Experience, yes, you’ve got it in spades, but what if the experience that fornication, drug abuse and hedonism entail isn’t what I’m looking for? Sod...
March 2010
3 posts
Quantum power trip
Nothing makes me feel better like owning mathematics. Sure, they’re just lifeless marks of chalk on a slate board, but why forgo the opportunity to feel like you’ve mastered something and beaten it into submission? It’s an awfully human feeling.
Wissen
I think I need help.
The Slip
I’m getting the feeling that the more I know, the less it matters to know anything. Physics is a game, a game at which I’m fairly decent, and it’s something to bide the time while I try to enjoy other facets of life that seem more firmly rooted in my consciousness, like spending time with Kendra or making new friends (something that makes me overly nervous). It is a game played...
February 2010
9 posts
blargh
I am never drinking again. Well, maybe.
pietas
I cannot bring myself to understand what is most evidently the fabric of my experience. I have seen it and turned away, and for that act of Platonic cave-dwelling, there can be no forgiveness.
Fridays in the Inferno
It’s week six of the semester, and I am beginning to dread Fridays a bit less each time. Tomorrow I have six classes, including but not limited to a quantum mechanics exam. If it were up to me, lunch would be mandatory for all human beings, but as it stands I get no such luxuries with classes from 9 AM - 3 PM. It now seems that there’s some small serenity in academic servitude; I...
Meandering
Today I went to an Anglican church for the first time in my life. I think, given the liturgical tradition, that I’m starting to see what I’ve been missing all this time. When you repeat the Lord’s Prayer, for example, the onus is upon you to transcend the mere English words that symbolize the Logos, and try to actually find that Logos for yourself. If you don’t,...
Notre Dame
I just got my acceptance letter from Notre Dame’s physics department the other day; so, I’m in someplace, which is mildly reassuring. I’m strongly considering going there, but I still don’t know whether or not Kendra will get in. To be honest, I was quite surprised to hear back so early, and only a week after the deadline at that. I’ve decided that I am not above...
“The Richard Feynman algorithm for solving impossible problems:
1) Write down...”
– Murray Gell-Mann, particle theorist
Hilbert Space
Today I just realized that wavefunctions in quantum mechanics live in Hilbert spaces. I’ve been studying metric vector spaces in my Lie Algebra class, and I’ve also been studying quantum mechanics, but never had I thought that the two would meet up in such a fantastically elegant way. For the past few weeks, Lie theory has been re-energizing my take on both physics and mathematics,...
December 2009
1 post
Frustration
Currently working on personal statements for graduate school… I love to write, but I hate writing about myself. The conclusion is foregone, and I inevitably come off sounding like a groveling sycophant or a pompous asshole. I just hope I can somehow navigate the via media and get into most of these places.
Fuck.
January 2009
3 posts
